i'v been wetter.

the fingers that i have kept crossed 

have made it difficult to hold onto things

this is why i pour coffee into my shirt

this is why i lose grip on, on and on

this is why i can't grasp the decisions you have made.

but i have been wetter, 

i have cried to whither,

and thou goest.

i have been wetter, and the coffee runs down my chest

under my shirt and wets my underwear

and i'm unsure of the weather,

and whether its the state of now, or did i just lose control

and wet myself.